Better Know a Footballah - Also-Rans

There's 12 schools in the SEC, and that's about 8 more schools than I really care to write about. Not all 12 schools are interesting. In fact, several of them have new coaches which only serves to make it difficult for me to write anything about them.

Auburn
Why Auburn would think they could replace Tommy Tuberville easily is a question that still has many Auburn fans guessing. Tubbs won 68% of his games as the Head Coach at Auburn, 3 seasons removed from an undefeated season (and getting shafted at a shot at the National Championship Gmae), won 6 straight against his rival ('Bama). He was fired for one bad season and replaced with the Greatest Head Coach EVER! ... oh wait, no. It's Gene Chizick, who went 5-7 last year with Iowa State. Nice move Auburn, really. 'Bama is still pointing and laughing at you.

Tennessee
Tennessee fired long time head coach Phil Fulmer after 13 years as the Head Voluenteer. They've replaced him with young up-start Lane Kiffin.

I don't know anything about Lane Kiffin other than the fact that he is now a member of the Former Raider Head Coach club. This is a quickly expanding list, and by all means does not reflect on his ability or inability to coach a football team. So, instead of badgering on about Lane Kiffen, here is a picture of his disproportionately hot wife.


Arkansas

This has nothing to do with Arkansas football... or does it?













Kentucky

Drawin' blood makes gettin' drunk off brown liquor easier!

Rich Brook, aside from his propensity to use the word "bullshit" in ever more creative ways than I could, has accomplished little as the coach of the Kentucky Wildcats. After feeling the hammer of the NCAA through the 2006 season, Brooks has coached the Wildcats to three consecutive bowl games, but has yet to leave a mark in the SEC accumulating a blandish average of 3-4 wins in the SEC per season.

Brooks is in effect a "zombie" coach, since as of last season the heavenly-named Joker Philips will become the head coach of Kentucky when Brooks steps down, which will most likely happen just as soon as he finishes his bourbon stash.













Alabama
You do not talk shit about Alabama football or Nick Saban. Especially on the internet. Nick Saban will send a SWAT team to your house, have them sedate you by covering your face in ether and have your limp carcass thrown into a van. When you wake up, you will not know where you are, but it will be dark, and there will be but one light shining directly in your face. This is fact. This is also how Nick Saban recruits.

I just say, "Roll Tide" - nothing to see here. Nope. Just keep moving.

Mr Happypants himself!