Better Know a Footballah - Mississippi State

Part 1 - Vanderbilt - is available here.

Ok, Semester Finals are over. This means school is done for the semester - this the whole "Final" part. Yeah, my brain is still not functioning properly. Bear with me while I do my best Etch-a-Sketch impression and shake my head so as to forget all the worthless shit that's stored up there.

Much better... now, where were we?

Ah yes. Football. Unfortunately for college football addicts, semester finals also means the entrance of the dark, lonely time of year when absolutely jack squat happens. no recruiting, no spring practices. no bowl games and worst of all - no College Gameday brought to you by the Home Depot.

This time of year reminds me a lot of driving from Ohio to Colorado for some of the infamous ski trips as a youngen' in the parents conversion van - I'm guessing I was 7 at the time. The trip starts out in the glorious Buckeye State. There is so much to see and do and take in. All the food is still unopened in the basket. The drinks are cold, the ice is fresh. You aren't sick of the tapes you brought to play in the walkman. Oh - and mom even bought you a super awesome magnetic travel checkers board so you and you sister can play checkers.

There is an excitement in the air that carries you through Indiana and Illinois. You're thinking about how great it's going to be to get out doors and hit the mountains. All of this optimism comes to a sudden and abrupt halt the second you enter Iowa. As you look past the St Louis Arch, your optimism begins to fade. You squint your eyes and look to the west and see... nothing. There is nothing in sight, even the road side signs that mark out the next closest town begin to become more spread out until the cease to exist. There are no "next closest towns." There is nothing to look forward to. There is the vast emptiness of...
...THE GREAT PLAINS.

But you push forward.

I'm sure about this time Dad's thoughts were beginning to shift a little as he starts to think to himself as the family sleeps, "hey, this is boring as hell, but I think I can make it."

He keeps driving.

Then after driving for weeks fueled by nothing but the finest McDonalds drive-thru food, crappy instant coffee and some methamphetamine purchased from some trucker named Ted at a rest area, he would see this soul crushing sign:


The will to live has been officially broken. Dad would forgot about the vast wasteland that is Nebraska. How it takes 10-12 hours to make it through that god forsaken state. But on the other side of it lies the glorious Rocky Mountains... after another 3 hours of driving through the eastern plains of Colorado.

Ya, the college off season is a lot like that drive (which could only take place in my imagination), and we've just crossed the border into Nebraska.

Mississippi State
Location: Starkville, MS
Mascot: Bully Bulldog

For those of you with astute observation skills, this is a bulldog. Not to be confused with UGA, of Georgia fame. SEC fans don't just inbreed in their familial relations, they inbreed in their school mascots, too.

Why Hate Them: We don't hate Miss St, for much the same reason it's impossible to hate someone who runs in the Special Olympics. If I have to elaborate on that statement any more than you, dear reader, are a soul-less individual who has an eternity of hell to look forward to. And your hell will consist of being restrained in a laying position and being drooled on by bulldogs for all eternity.

Road Trip Worthiness:
Mississippi has a tradition of ringing cowbells at their games. Unless you miss the days of living on pasture with stampeding bovine, there is no reason to attend a game at Miss St. However, the BBQ from there is legendary, so if you're hungry - it may be worth the gas money.